Loving Arizona and Missing Hawaii

Saturday, August 27, 2011


I remember growing up reading a stitchery that my mom made... it hung on the hall wall outside my bedroom and I walked by it a lot... I read it a lot...

Cooking and cleaning can wait til tomorrow,
for babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs and dust go to sleep,
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

I didn't totally grasp the meaning at the time, but now, as a mother of soon to be 4, and my first little baby just starting kindergarten... I most definitely do!

To keep perspective, I try to ask myself often what it is I'm focused on and where my attention is... and so I ask you, dear young mothers:

Are your children hanging at your legs as you try to make the bed, wash the laundry or dishes... fix dinner? Are you typing on the computer as your children are whimpering at your knee with a toy in hand?

Is this the time of your life??

Are you worn out? Exhausted? Just trying to "get there"?

Are you sitting on the floor playing with your children... dressing the dolls, reading books, playing cars or rolling the ball?

Is this incessant whining and crying just to drive you crazy or is it because you are missing an opportunity now that will never be there for you again?

Are you saying "just a minute" all day while your child wants to ask you questions and play... as you try to wash those last few dishes or put a couple of papers or toys away... does the park have to wait until later or tomorrow because that errand is so pressing?

3, 4 or 5 years down the road from now when you are finally organized and your life "is in order" are you going to look around your ankles to find that your young ones don't want to play with you anymore...? They'd rather play with their friends, and they spend half of their waking hours with a new teacher... a school teacher... rather than their mother teacher they've had from birth... don't miss out on what is yours for such a short time.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

since we have the time...

Anyone want to guess how big this little girl will be?? Or what day she will be born??

My first: 5 lbs, 7 oz, 20 inches and 2 1/2 weeks early

My second: 6 lbs, 13 oz, 19 inches and 4 days early

My third: 6 lbs, 12 oz, 20 inches and 2 1/2 weeks early

anyone think we might actually have a "7-pound-er" this time?? Probably not, but you never know!

still pregnant...

Still pregnant... not much news other than my ultrasounds on my leg Monday showed that I don't have any blood clots in my deep veins (deep vein thrombosis). That is VERY good news! Now we're just hoping that this little girl will be born soon enough before my veins get any worse.

Other than the pain and the waiting game, things are going very well... we don't have near the complications we have had in the past and our baby, though still very tiny is doing well... healthy and strong.

We feel so blessed and loved by so many wonderful friends and family members. Thank you, thank you, to all who have helped and been praying for us. No matter how small or insignificant it may seem to you, let me assure you that this is exactly what Christ taught when he admonished us to bear one another's burdens. Our load has definitely felt lighter through your love and service. We also have felt that extra strength on days when we just didn't know how we'd make it through. My Nana says, sometimes you just have to focus on making it through the next few minutes, and then once you do, you go from there.

We are very excited and feel very blessed to have this little girl coming to our family. We know she's worth every sacrifice. We will definitely keep you posted as soon as we have anything exciting to share!

Thank you again! We love you and are grateful for you!

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

How does it feel to be told you CANNOT be on bedrest?

relieving, exhausting, overwhelming... all at the same time.

So what does it mean, really?

Everything's still the same... all the same risks, all the same problems... just that being on bed rest is potentially more life threatening to me than not being on bed rest. doesn't that sound nice? The veins in my leg are so bad that just resting for a day and a half brought on what we are hoping is just an infection in one of my veins and not a clot. The pain from it makes it difficult to walk...pretty bad alone, but on top of everything else... can anyone say scream, cry, throw up and pass out all at the same time??

I have felt very calm in my heart all along about this baby. I feel she will be just fine. I know she's Heavenly Father's daughter, and he is watching over her. My biggest fear has been developing a blood clot and all the repercussions that come with that... complications it adds to delivery, the threat it is to my life and also my baby's. not to mention the way it may alter the rest of my life. I have done everything I can to try and prevent this situation throughout this pregnancy... so no matter how exhausted or awful I feel, I still force myself to get those impossible hose on each day and get out of bed, no matter how painful... and get moving.

maybe you can imagine my anxiety over being put on bed rest? So, here I am hobbling around the house... trying to keep my blood flowing through the contractions and the pain in my leg, the exhaustion and nausea... just keep moving, moving, moving... and whether it puts me into labor, or brings on my pre-eclampsia necessary for induction... chances are this little girl is coming soon, and we're praying I last until then and that by then, she'll be just fine.

a long 24 hours

well, more like a long last few days.

I started feeling really sick and experiencing a lot of abdominal pain starting Thursday morning this week. I finally went into the doctor's office later that afternoon and the only conclusion that we came to was that I was experiencing early labor, but it wasn't causing me to dilate or progress in anyway toward birth, so not to worry about it too much unless it got worse. Thursday was shot. I was exhausted from all of the pain. Friday was a little better and by Saturday morning, I felt almost back to my usual pregnant self. However, Saturday night, it hit again, and this time harder than the first. I thought I was just sick... like with a stomach ache, and tried walking around the block, soaking in warm bath, curling up in a little ball on my knees and elbows... nothing seemed to provide much if any relief. After about 5 hours, the pain became so intense that I started vomiting. I vomited for a couple of hours until there was nothing left to vomit. Finally we decided to head into the OB triage to see what was going on. I was thinking... maybe food poisoning? Maybe the flu? Who would have guessed... LABOR... contractions every 3 minutes. So, that's what that pain was! The only odd thing about it is that it wasn't making me progress. So, after an bag of saline through the IV, a shot of Tribultylene and a shot of zofran, I was on my way home again...just as the sun came up... still in a lot of pain, but a little more relaxed to where I could actually give into the exhaustion and sleep for a couple of hours. My relief was short lived because at 8 am, it all started again. This prodromal labor, as they call it comes on so suddenly and so strong! And the worst part, there's no relief. At least if it was real labor and I was progressing and getting ready to deliver, there would be an end in sight, and options for pain management... like... EPIDURAL! but not with this vicious attack. The nurse described my next couple of weeks to a month that I have to look forward to as "you feel like you just want to murder someone, but there's nothing we can do about it." great. The rest of my day has been a fog.

I'm trying to keep an optimistic perspective. I remember when I was so sick with morning sickness that I was shaking and couldn't get out of bed, I thought... I can't do this for another 10 plus weeks... like I did with Noah. But I survived, and it didn't last as long as I was worried about. At that point I still had 32 weeks to go. Now I have 4 1/2 or less. perspective. and knowing that the end result will be the sweetest baby girl I can imagine in my arms makes it all worth it.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

such a character!

Ethan is such a character! He always keeps us on our toes and giggling. Today he was making thank you cards for all of his friends that came to his Batman birthday party... He wanted to write BATMAN on all of the cards...

Me: "I'll show you how to write it..."

Ethan: feeling like he doesn't need mom's help... he already knows... "Is it P-R-A-N-C?"

um. no.